Thursday, April 30, 2009
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
i became an aunty by proxy recently. my second degree niece courtesy of serena & eugene is called nehlia whose etymology from tibetan lies in "strength".
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
a little film i made with dermot & raen on the run between airports on 2 X NOKIA phones for KINO KABARET's 48 hour film challenge in conjunction with adelaide film festival 2009.
part of my "loves me not" introverted narrative mental health series all shot on mobile phones for punk monk propaganda.
Monday, April 27, 2009
Friday, April 24, 2009
i wonder if this is the universal condition?
vacancy is rife. let's linger in the dark crooks & cracked crannies of nothingness. why not?
the cracked underbelly of what lies beneath the radar. perfection is so yesteryear [today].
negative space all seductive: vampyr unleashed, feel the rhythm.
hedonism: an all encompassing two dimensional reptilian cloak sensually shrouding reality.
sure beats suburban reality for the wakeful.
i wanna fuck you too, let me tell you muthafuckers whose built to last.
our brains will still be here tomorrow. what we choose not to remember then don't count.
Thursday, April 23, 2009
the photo above is one i took in a friend's house which has been boarded up for well over a decade as a mausoleum. it has been left untouched, the family home where he grew up playing on his bicycle on the driveway etc since the day his parents divorced. it's the most eerie altar to a forgotten era & lost love i've ever seen. the dust-heavy sadness so thick you can almost cut it with a knife, or camera lens.
statistics show that half of all american children will witness the break-up of a parent's marriage. of these, close to half will also see the break-up of a parent's second marriage. the figures in australia are not so different.
the decrease in social stigma of divorce in western civilisation has resulted in phenomenal growth of marriages terminated before "death do us part". there are other valid reasons too but this seems to be a huge contributing factor.
the institution of marriage is not what it once was and is something of a static white elephant. it was always an arguably patriarchal property transaction which both diminished & dehumanised women.
more important than anything is that our society still leans on an unrealistic archaic nuclear family model where children and adults alike form expectations of blissful permanence. when the structure capsizes, as it invariably does more than 50% of the time, the support network is cumbersome & unworkable. it comes as a crushing blow regardless of marrying in perfectly with probability.
"broken home" has actually been eradicated from the everyday vernacular in a sociological trickledown effect because it implies damage, which is well documented. the hurt didn't stop, a politically correct band-aid just got stuck on.
monogamy is an artificial device created by religion to invalidate polytheism & age-old gaia based worship and to wield control over the populace. more & more it is being proven not to work even though it's a delightful idea which sells hallmark cards. only 3% of species on earth are and it's increasingly apparent that we're more often than not, not one of them.
despite marriage not being forever, people keep doing it expecting it to be, although marriage statistics are on the decline. unmarried household couples are still on an exponential increase [and have been since the mid 80s according to the US census bureau].
the joining of assets through wedded or common law union has never been a more legally active endeavor & pre-nups/co-habitation agreements keep lawyers happily scribing, buzzing like busy worker bees. their large pools, homes and cars: testament to the boom in family/property law. it's a lucrative business. between my ex-fiancé & myself, 320 000 AUD was spent warring over just one property. a very large chunk on legals, and that was for a very inconsequential settlement... love lost, the lawyers won.
we grow up under the false premise of a hans christian anderson sterilised fairy tale blended with a zero coke commercial where love is pure romance and we all end up energetically galloping off to the castle beyond the sunset with princes on our high horses with decreasing waistlines & a perpetually frosted vision. too bad if you get the lame pony... like most of us invariably will.
perhaps not just us as individuals, but the whole face of our society can implement real change in a positive way now, not to be the same as the last. who knows? if stupid white men remain in power probably not. but as they are increasingly raised by women & others in household models which deviate "from the norm" and various versions of SWM invade the white house, local government, our court rooms etc perhaps there's a chance the cycle will continue to evolve/devolve. still that's what was said post revolutionary haight-ashbury days. after burning bras, tuning in & dropping out, massive hypocrisy reigned and the beat generation mutated mostly back into their 1950s conservative parents. the acid came out in the wash.
maybe there's a future where lovely homes like my friend's needn't be shut up indefinitely so that painful memories can't escape to haunt those who still can't bear the heart-deep emotional scars. a place where it's not necessary to hide behind locked doors. i suspect that is a world where santa & easter bunny's masks have melted off revealing the corporate money making machine behind them. it might just take awhile.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
KINO is so much more than an underground film movement.
Monday, April 20, 2009
so i've been thinking about serial killers a bit lately. questions of ticks, triggers, all part of the course for realistic character development for my protaganist which we'll be filming later this year. she won't be shooting anyone but she lives on the sharp divide between myth and reality.
in the course of my research which covered psychological profiling, weird factors invariably come up. there's a lot of mythology regarding this area of human endeavor manifested mostly through the media.
one aspect which is consistent are dysfunctional family backgrounds featuring at least one overbearing adult figure. there's ALWAYS a conflict source, often violence, sex, drug abuse of sorts just to pathologically spin the adolescent mind off even further from the intense flux of the teenage condition.
once again, we're so over-exposed to all this stuff now it's like being hit with the 40 hour famine on high repetitive mode punctuated by recycled imagery of bloated, fly bown malnutrition children who can be saved by jesus organisations, right? in this case religion really is their last hope, because noone else seems to care. we're all too consumed by our little lives or for some, those of our neighbour [he looks like norman bates].
what comprises dysfunction is hugely subjective and has been immersed into popular culture vernacular. however the main definition used by medical practitioners relates to where relationships in a family unit do not promote or are conducive to emotional & physical health. dysfunction is bigger than the individual. like everything in life, it's about connections, or lack of.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
actually a rare phenomenum & only occurring approx once every two years or so, in 2009 we are scheduled for a second full moon in the same calendar month, but it won't be until NYE. so happy blue moon for then.
in the shadow of the night, i found this tree in dark broody shades of blue projected onto a wall by a passing car's headlights. ella fitzgerald prematurely sang in my ears: the voices had returned, the pulse quickens in anticipation, equal parts excitement:fear. everything is new again.
sadly there was no moon of any hue to be seen in the sky this evening. but this is that black & blue eucalyptus tree shadow. if you look long enough you can see marlene dietrich hiding in the branches like a cheshire angel harmonising with ella on their similarly themed signature songs. women in the moon who fell to earth.
if love must be our downfall, then professor rath chose no better or more heroic way than to lose his dignity with deitrich's showgirl. surely there is no nobler cause, even if it potentially makes us ridiculous. the emmanuels & lolas of this world, despite their impaired cliche, are rockstars.
fortune and love favor the brave. -- ovid.
Friday, April 17, 2009
big veggie brekkie with free-range poached eggs, mushrooms, divine cubed potato hash, grilled tomatoes with basil, seared haloumi & steamed spinach on organic sourdough [15.00 AUD] is the perfect start to what will be a very long action-packed day.
[apparently the coffee is pretty good too]
i ♥ lovegrub.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
with an appetite for fresh film fodder, a late night excursion is made to king st, newtown. like new york, this humble 4th cousin once removed, almost never sleeps. it's the 2nd runner-up to sydney's chinatown & king's cross for late night fixes, food or otherwise.
boasting the latest legit opening bottle store in NSW [WOOT!]: the townie in newtown is open for off license to 23:45, 7 days a week [bar HC public holidays] which is well exploited by the locals who form a comfortably colorful & chill textured mix of goth, dyke, rockabilly, artist, muso & intellectual derelict. unforced street chic.
a perfect vibe without the dullness of overt shiny self-awareness: although almost everyone looks good enough to eat... patterns & rainbow hues mishmash into a wonderful kaleidescope. several peeps run amok with heads which would look good on a stick.
a local institution, i once was asked to remove my beret by the over-zealous bulldog bouncers & which i refused without intentional disrespect to the queen. they didn't appreciate "bad hair day" as an excuse. beefcake doormen are not hired for their charm, logic, fashion sense or conversational abilities. that seems to be a universal phenomena. luckily, in case of wardrobe malfunctions, there are loads of other bars...
patrick bateman would love it here. he'd just have to modify his style... a bold-striped shirt does NOT call for a solid-colored or discreetly patterned suit and tie. in newtown absolutely anything goes with hush puppies.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
a black historical sightseeing parade would have us wandering lost in tragic celebration for the death of calmar and orla whilst nietzsche conjures up music for byron's other rockstar manfred before sarah blasko bleats out that sweet broken version of david bowie's heartfelt heroes [just for one day].
to find out more join the queue with me & read hey nietzsche! leave them kids alone!
Monday, April 13, 2009
is soylent green made out of poor people?
Sunday, April 12, 2009
"nice wheels", he said.
the city is behind us. the metaphoric mexican border, temporary shelter to the cussing king of psychopaths, the degraded holy goof, in sight.
sal paradise travels alongside old bull lee & carlo marx. the beat generation exhumed will conquer, flaws proudly waving like a banner to the four winds.
yesterday i was fortunate enough to stumble upon a secret garden rich in st patrick's hues.
a lost bastion of the wild in sydney's northern suburbs, this roughcut gem is the unkempt rebel of the hood after being forgotten by its owners for the last ten years. in lane cove, this is where the wild things are.
Friday, April 10, 2009
Thursday, April 9, 2009
there's a hyper-reality to the finger wharf, woolloomooloo in its picture perfect intensity dotted by the ladies & gentlemen who lunch.